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Old January 7th, 2012, 08:14
Ms angelina Ms angelina is offline
Junior Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Formby, merseyside
Posts: 1
Angry 5 angels 😥

Hi my name is angelina , I don't really know we're to start. Back in November 2003 I lost my first child Caitlan who was born at 21 wks 5 days gestation and it was the hardest thing in the world having to plan her funeral and say goodbye but I learnt to cope and be strong then on the 29th August 2004 I lost my son Brandon who was born at the same gestation. I knew I needed to find the strength to stay strong for everyone around me but it was so hard and almost impossible. Then all I wanted was to be a mummy and once again on the 28th April 2005 I lost my baby kian at 19 wks gestation by this time I was starting to slip into depression having 3 of my children buried in a cemetery and back and forward to the hospital because during labour with Kian I caught septicaemia and was extremely ill. I had to have a blood transfusion aswel as trying to grieve for my babies I was really ill and unable to do anything. I buried my son and broke down completerly at his graveside . I don't know what I had done so wrong to deserve to have to go through all this heartache . I waited a few years and had a cervical suture inserted to help me be able to carry a child then on the 15th July 2007 I gave birth to my beautiful baby girl jasmine born at 33 wks gestation and i was extremely happy but still also trying to grieve for my 3 angels . I didn't think anything could go wrong from then on so when I fell pregnant in 2008 I was extremely anxious because of everything I had been though in the past years and on the 28th December 2008 my daughter Gabriella was born at 22 wks gestation even tho I had done exactly the same throughout my pregnancy a I had with jasmine by getting the suture once again and taking the fragmin injections daily and the other numerous medication it hadn't been enough and now I had to bury yet another of my angels so from this point onwards I was going to get a hysterectomy because I didn't ever want to go through this but before I was due to get a hysterectomy I found out I was pregnant and I don't believe in abortions so I went into hospital where I stayed on bed rest for a few months then when I finally came home for a bit I started to bleed and was rushed bk to hospital where once again I was on bed rest and all the examinations and test were done and came back fine then on the 28th September 2009 I gave birth to my beautiful daughter Melissa who was born at 28 wks gestation and she was really small but looke perfect and they took her down to the neonatal unit and I thought everything was going to be fine but the doctor walked trough the door of my hospital room and told me that she had passed away after only 2 hours of being alive I jut went into complete shock and shut down. I didn't want to carry on my own life from that day forward and I wanted to know why god would hurt one person so badly by taking away 5 of her children?? .
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Old January 7th, 2012, 09:38
cljm cljm is offline
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 95

Ms angelina,

Bless you and your 5 little angels.....

You have suffered immeasureable losses.

I do not have the answer as, "why", but I do know that God is not a hurtful God. In our human form we suffer greatly at times and we cry out at the injustice of it all. When we are in such deep despair, we reach to blame---to want to hold someone responsible for what has happened--- no one escapes the trials and tribulations of life. God's "WILL" is something that we cannot understand, but it is through our Faith that we can come to accept what may be put upon us.

Your darling Jasmine, now about 4 or 5---perhaps is all of your little angels rolled into one.

Many Blessings to you.....
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Old January 7th, 2012, 13:28
Marjatta Marjatta is offline
Join Date: Nov 2011
Posts: 97

Dear Angelina,

You have my greatest respect and admiration for what you have endured and how you have continued to carry on. My heart can't even begin to fathom the depth of your loss and grief.

I truly believe that each of your angels had a purpose here during their brief time on earth. They may have touched lives and taught lessons to people that you may not even be aware of.

I believe that the youngest ones who pass away actually have the oldest souls. Perhaps they didn't need to learn anything else but were rather put on earth to teach something necesssary to the rest of us.

You have shown amazing strength and grace, and I truly hope you will continue to share with us on these forums.

God bless and big hugs,

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Old January 8th, 2012, 06:30
tom-fisherman tom-fisherman is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Northwest England
Posts: 534

Shalom in Yeshua Angelina, I really don't know how to begin expressing my feelings to you. I am so sorry you have lost five angels. Your story brought back so many painful memories for me as I lost two boys in infancy.

When I hear that babies have gone 'home' I tend to think that God is gathering together additional angels for a purpose we don't know about or yet understand. The reason I say this is when I lost my first boy from cot death he wasn't the only one that night. There where several on the same night in the same area we lived in. Totally unexplained.

I want you to know also that there is a special part of Heaven especially set aside for babies and children. Here they are tended by the angels and as a result they become angelic like in appearance as they develop. We try to give our children everything in this world but the true real gifts wait for us in the next life. Your angels will be waiting for you when its time for you to go home.

Please come back and let us help you with your grief and know that you will be in my prayers this week.

May God bless you
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