The Light Beyond Bereavement Forum Bereavement StoreMovieBlogSympathy Ecards
Kindness in another's trouble, courage in your own...

Go Back   The Light Beyond Bereavement Forums > Loss of a loved one > Loss of a child
Register FAQ Members List Calendar Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old April 30th, 2012, 21:03
Marion Marion is offline
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 7
Default The loss of my daughter

My daughter passed away on March 11th in our home. One minute she's in our bedroom talking with her dad and I about ideas on making a new cat tree for our cats and 20 minutes later she laid dead in her bed while on Facebook making lunch plans with a friend. She was 20, and so far all they say that they think she had a heart attack but where we live things are so backed up we won't know anything definitely for possibly 16 weeks. She also worked with me for the past 5 years so I don't know which is worse home or work. We're going to counseling along with our 18 year old son but I really am having a hard time on a daily basis. I know they say don't make any big decisions right away but without a place to go for any length of time without constant reminders. No where to breathe. Any thoughts from anyone If I should think of a different job or hold tight
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old May 1st, 2012, 05:27
tom-fisherman tom-fisherman is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Northwest England
Posts: 534
Default

Shalom in Yeshua Marion, welcome to the forum. I am so sorry to hear about you daughter. Know that I have already said a prayer for you, your husband, and your son to be comforted.

Sudden Adult Death Syndrome is always unexpected and is a huge shock to the system. You are all bound to be in this state and it will probably last until you start finding out the results of the tests. It doesn't somehow feel natural burying a child, does it? We all start questioning ourselves and asking was there something I did or could have done, to prevent it from happening. Well the answer is no it was just her time to go home.

What you need to do as a family is talk about her, rejoice in her life and remember all the happy moments you shared together. My brothers and sisters in faith are taught that our loved ones while in Sheol can still hear us. So if you can sit as a family and talk, include her in your discussion. Do it on your own as well, as she will hear you. She is just in a different dimension to ours. Her love for you all will never change.

May God bless you
Tom
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old May 1st, 2012, 11:48
cal821 cal821 is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Canada
Posts: 477
Default My Heart goes out to you and your family in your loss

Marion,


I am very sorry to hear of your loss of your daughter..


Please know that you have come to a place of compassion and Kindred Spirits ... where you can read ... write.. vent.. rant.. contemplate... and never be judged for it.


In coming here this is the frst step of many small steps in you trying to find understanding in your loss.. Keep writing .. tell us how your doing... The best thing for you in your grief is to keep talking as it opens the channels and helps you to release small amounts of your pain and sorrow.. bit by bit...


There are many of us here.. so please know you are " NOT ALONE ".



Again my sincere condolences on the passing of your daughter..


I wish you peace when the pain and sorrow are raging and clarity of thought in the morass of it all..



Cal821
__________________
Memory can only tell us what we were,
in the company of those we loved;
it cannot help us find what each of us, alone, must now become.
Yet no person is really alone;
those who live no more echo still within our thoughts and words,
and what they did has become woven into what we are.

I wish you peace and a level path on your journey...

Cal821
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old May 1st, 2012, 14:56
hazelharris hazelharris is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 1,143
Default

my dear marion i cannot begin to say how grieved i am for your very sad loss my heart goes out to you and your family what a terrible loss and enormous shock there will be no easy or quick way that you will overcome this i pray that you know that she is very happy in heaven but that as comforting as it is doesn't help in the early dark days as we mourn them and miss them so
light a candle to her in the evening as most of us do and talk to her as she will hear it will help. she left all her love with you it didn't go anywhere she left it with you to stay in your heart forever
we are all here to listen here to share your loss here to offer our prayers and hear to understand your grief love hazelxx
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old May 2nd, 2012, 05:25
hazelharris hazelharris is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 1,143
Default

hi marion i thought i would just send a message to you today to say i have been thinking of you you were in my prayers we are here for you if you want to talk love hazelxx
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old May 2nd, 2012, 23:11
Marion Marion is offline
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 7
Default Another day

Thank you for your thoughts and prayers. Some days are much worse than others. My husband and I struggle how to move forward and go through the rest of our lives and have a full life. How to make sense out of what happened and why. Our daughter had issues but was very smart and was working very hard to move forward in her job and be independent. I guess time will tell and we will keep going to therapy to help bring some peace to us and make sure our son gets through all this and moves forward in his life also. Things like this sure does make me feel extremely old before my time. Thank you again and keep us in your prayers.
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old May 3rd, 2012, 10:58
StarbrightRuby StarbrightRuby is offline
Junior Member
 
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Devon, UK
Posts: 4
Default

Dear Marion

I'm so sorry to hear that your daughter died so suddenly and unexpectedly. It is good to hear that you are getting support through the counselling - such an event is deeply shocking and bewildering.

It is natural that some days are feeling better than others - allow yourself, your husband and your son the time and space needed for yourselves right now. Be there for each other and as you've already been advised, allow the memories of your daughter to be shared and cherished.

Sending you all much love and many blessings
Ruby
__________________
You are a child of the universe and are surrounded by love in every moment of your existence
Ruby Starheart
Loving Transformation
Reply With Quote
  #8  
Old May 11th, 2012, 01:29
Marion Marion is offline
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 7
Default My sweet Samantha

Tomorrow it will be 2 months since my daughter passed away. The emotional turmoil makes me feel like I've aged 20 years yet if I close my eyes I feel like it was yesterday. With this weekend being mothers day, I just don't know how people get through this. The anxiety of it all makes me feel like I'm over the edge. Please does someone have a way to get through all of this
Reply With Quote
  #9  
Old May 11th, 2012, 06:41
hazelharris hazelharris is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 1,143
Default

i'm sorry marion there is no easy way to get through all this i wish there was a miricle pill we could take to erase all the pain but we would never take it as in erasing pain we would also erase the memories the feelings and the comfort of love we just have to survive the best we can each day and hopefully coming to terms with it all with the realisation that our loved ones your samantha is in heaven no pain no worries just with the feeling of pure love
is there some way you can just celebrate her life on mothers day but i think you need to light a candle to her and give yourself time alone just to talk to her cal put a wonderful thread on about mothers day all his threads are worth you reading and may give you comfort
i know when a loved one dies we look for the little dissagreements we had in the past theres bound to be some thing big or very small and you have probably found something to beat yourself up over well don't do it your samantha loved you you were her mum and she always loved you her love is there in your heart
i hope and pray you all find comfort in one another and find a way together through these sad days where you can remember samantha in a way she would have wished to be remembered with a smile instead of tears thinking of you all love hazelxxx
Reply With Quote
  #10  
Old May 11th, 2012, 09:54
gumek gumek is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 746
Default marion

Hello Marion, just read your heartbreaking story,so sorry for your loss and was very sad to read how she passed. Many of our forum family have shared your sadness, and we can't say any, words that will comfort you, all i can say my love is that you will find loving hearts here who wont judge, just be here to listen and support. With all our friends i welcome you, and i am so sorry that it had to be this way to meet you. Always someone here to listen, to cry, to give support.

kind regards

chrissie.
Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump


All times are GMT -5. The time now is 10:00.


Copyright 2017 The Light Beyond. Visit the main site at www.thelightbeyond.com