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  #11  
Old July 14th, 2007, 00:47
lilyflower_1978 lilyflower_1978 is offline
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I have to agree that everyone grieves in their own way and breaking down crying doesn't make you any more normal than not. Follow what is right for you.
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  #12  
Old September 23rd, 2007, 15:51
Priscilla Priscilla is offline
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I've been referred to as a 'closet crier'. I just don't feel comfortable weeping around people. Those rare times that I do, my loved ones usually try to just sit back and leave me to it.
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  #13  
Old September 23rd, 2007, 17:51
riskey58 riskey58 is offline
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Default I know we all grieve in different ways

I am the type that seems to hold it in. I do most of my grieving when I am all alone. That is when I can let go of all my feelings.
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  #14  
Old November 15th, 2007, 18:15
RoxyMoron RoxyMoron is offline
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Something I didn't mention before, was after the initial shock, I tend to listen to a lot of music that either cheers me up or lets me cry it out, even if the song isn't intended to be sad but sets the solemn mood.
I also have a weird thing I do, I try to watch comedies because laughter helps me forget everything.
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  #15  
Old November 16th, 2007, 01:51
shay shay is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sandmike123 View Post
but my husband says I am not normal... My first reaction is to shut down which I do. But I do grieve and cry when the time is right. He thinks there is something wrong with me since I don't get all teary eyed. Does anyone else do this?
I don't get teary-eyed either. Well, I finally did when I saw them putting the coffin that I knew my grandpa was in in the ground. That just was kind of a slap in the face. I don't shut down though. What do you mean by that? Like not eat and stuff?
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  #16  
Old November 16th, 2007, 08:48
dukettemom dukettemom is offline
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i think my dh didn't quite know what to do with me when my mother died last year b/c i didn't "act" like he thought i would.

i'm an easy crier. heck, i cry at tv commercials. it's almost a joke in my family- "Pass the tissues, mom's gonna cry....."

but for me, when my mom died, i was initially relieved b/c i'd been 'holding my breath, waiting' since 1984 when she had her first heart attack. She'd been in failing and fragile health for 22 years. I'd been riding a rollercoaster for all that time. Every time she had a crisis, i'd steel myself. And she'd recover and i'd be relieved to some extent. But still waiting. So, when she didn't make it thru this final crisis, i was 'somewhat' relieved that it the rollercoaster ride was over, for her as well. And i was happy that she was finally reunited with my dad who died in 1977. He was the love of her life, and a day never passed that she didn't miss him.

and then, there were so many arrangements to make. She died in TX and wanted to be buried in NC. So we had all those arrangements to make.

But a big part of my holding myself together was that i was afraid if i let go and started crying, i wouldn't be able to stop. or breathe.

i cried. i still cry. i am right now, as i write this. but i try to keep it together for my family. if i fall apart, who's going to hold them together?
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  #17  
Old November 17th, 2007, 21:34
RoxyMoron RoxyMoron is offline
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That's sort of what I thought when my 2nd friend died last year. He was best pals with the 1st one so I felt better when I imagined that they would be clowning around up there together. We always hope that there's more to life than physical being.
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