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  #1  
Old September 19th, 2007, 20:29
Calypso Calypso is offline
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Default Fighting Families

It always breaks my heart to see family members turning on each other instead of to each other when a loved one is dying. So often old quarrels come up and intensify and make the dying process harder for everyone involved. And since these arguments often go back years, they're difficult if not impossible to mediate.
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  #2  
Old September 19th, 2007, 22:52
Sunnycharacter Sunnycharacter is offline
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I never understood this human reaction to grief. It happens more often than not, when families should be coming together. Humans can be so mean.
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  #3  
Old September 21st, 2007, 12:05
Priscilla Priscilla is offline
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I've seen this happen within my own family. After seeing it particularly bad when my uncle died, my husband and I have informed our parents that we are not going to fight for anything material. If our sibling raise a stink about where the family heirlooms go, we are just going to say "alrighty". Most of the time, actions like that are simply started to pick a fight anyway. We will ensure that our parents burial wishes are respected though.
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Old September 22nd, 2007, 17:14
Calypso Calypso is offline
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I've been lucky where my own family and friends are concerned...grief has always brought us closer together instead of pushing us farther apart. But I've seen some situations with clients. Once when I was working in an emergency room, I actually had to break up a fight that started when two siblings both went for a diamond ring on their dead brother's finger! I just wanted to knock their heads together...!
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  #5  
Old September 23rd, 2007, 09:21
riskey58 riskey58 is offline
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Default Fighting famlies

This happened in my family. My older sister fought about everything that we did, She was never close to the family. In fact when she did finally did come and see my mom she was very cold. I think no matter what you should set your feelings aside when there is a death in the family.
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  #6  
Old December 21st, 2007, 10:52
flowerchilde flowerchilde is offline
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Default family quarrels

Yes, I think it's terrible when this happens! And it's a mystery to me also why people respond this way. Sometimes (all too often) disputes break out over wills.. or even just houses and household goods.. And thAt's really sad!
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  #7  
Old December 21st, 2007, 16:50
ginahunt3 ginahunt3 is offline
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While my mother was in the hosp. having me, my grandfather was making arrangements for his moms funeral. After everything was done it was time for the will. Grandpa is one 7 children, he is the last one living, his brother, Uncle Al, thought Grandpa got more than he deserved so he stopped speaking to him. It has been at least 10 yrs. since Uncle Al died and they never spoke again. Grandpa didn't even go to the funeral. That is a shame but there is nothing anyone can do now.
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  #8  
Old December 21st, 2007, 17:09
mollyL mollyL is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Priscilla View Post
I've seen this happen within my own family. After seeing it particularly bad when my uncle died, my husband and I have informed our parents that we are not going to fight for anything material. If our sibling raise a stink about where the family heirlooms go, we are just going to say "alrighty". Most of the time, actions like that are simply started to pick a fight anyway. We will ensure that our parents burial wishes are respected though.
My husband and I told my parents the same thing, that we would not fight for anything material. When my father-in-law died, my husband's mom and elder brother put on a very unseemly show arguing over who should have my father-in-law's onyx and diamond ring. Finally they turned to my husband (both probably thinking that my husband would agree with one or the other) and asked him who should have the ring. My husband replied that he thought the ring should be buried with his dad. We never did find out who got the ring in the long run, we only know that his dad wasn't buried wearing it.
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  #9  
Old December 22nd, 2007, 19:33
ginahunt3 ginahunt3 is offline
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My father had a ruby ring which being an only child I should have gotten, but his sister never gave it to me. When my paternal grandmother died, I was to get her rings. My aunt refused to let me have them. 2 weeks after the funeral her house was robbed now noone has them.
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  #10  
Old January 9th, 2008, 16:37
twocents twocents is offline
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My family went through this when my uncle passed and I was really surprised because this never happened before. Everyone just had a lot of stuff they were trying to work through and it all came out.
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