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  #11  
Old August 19th, 2007, 08:07
DavidThomasrau DavidThomasrau is offline
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The truth is, that grief and bereavement hit us harder these days because we quite often reach middle age or so before losing anyone close to us.

Until 100 years or so ago, death was something everyone became familiar with during childhood. Large families, fatal childhood illnesses that are now non-fatal, a lack of mass produced medicines, no anti-biotics, poor sanitation, no health and safety legislation. All these things combined to increase the death rate of children through illness, of working men and women through work based accidents and illnesses, and substantially lowered life expectance.

If you've lived through the death of a sibling or two, and a parent and a grandparent or two, before you've reached your teens, then in a sense it's something you became used to. Although always a shock, for most people it became a fact of life.

These days, thankfully, it's something most people in the developed world never get used to.
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  #12  
Old August 23rd, 2007, 22:01
Priscilla Priscilla is offline
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My first loss of a really good friend was when I was eighteen. My friend was such a kind and soft soul and I still miss him. He was always so playful and happy.
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  #13  
Old August 24th, 2007, 00:25
echos echos is offline
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I was 18, when a very good friend of mine, lost his footing on a Dam and fell over 65 feet and died before many of his friends eyes. Very distrubing.
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  #14  
Old August 24th, 2007, 01:41
azaleaeight azaleaeight is offline
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Default First Loss of A Friend

When I was in third grade a girl I'd shared grades 1 through 3 with, who died of leukemia. I didn't even really know what to make of it. She was missing from school for a long time. Then everyone began to say she had leukemia. Months later the teacher said she had died.

When I was 20, though, I was in a car accident with my two girlfriends, and my best friend (since seventh grade) was killed. She and I had been like "conjoined twins" since we had become friends at twelve years old, and we grew up together. I had to get used to looking at my future without her, and I had to also just get used to not having her around all the time.

While I certainly got over it (the way people get over things like that), it was pretty much as if my life became derailed (in terms of moving from youth into the future I'd imagined), and I never got to go back on that "right" track that I had been travelling on.

Some people would believe that I was put on the "right track" for me (since many believe things happen for a reason). I've never been able to really accept that idea. I've always pretty much seen my life as having move on along a different track than that "right one" (which would have been a matter of travelling along without such a huge derailment and without having such a thing in my past).

Sometimes, though, I more imagine it as a matter of having been thrown off one track, derailed for a while, and then getting back on the original track. When I think of it that way, I imagine looking back at a section of broken track that can never be repaired.
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  #15  
Old August 26th, 2007, 14:06
janus76 janus76 is offline
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apart from family members i m havent yet lost a friend and must say it is one thing i dread happening
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  #16  
Old August 27th, 2007, 00:06
cassiem0221 cassiem0221 is offline
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well, my grandmother will have died one year ago on the 2nd of September and I still have problems coping with this. I don't think I will ever feel the same. I still get up and want to call and talk to her. Its hard for most anyone to deal with issues like these.
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  #17  
Old September 19th, 2007, 23:55
Sunnycharacter Sunnycharacter is offline
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It wasn't really a friend, but my friends brother was killed on a motorcycle. I found out by stopping by her house to walk with her to school, not knowing what happened. Her mom answered the door and was all upset. When I found out what she was saying I felt so bad for stopping by, but I didn't know. I'll never forget that day.
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  #18  
Old October 14th, 2007, 11:36
atula atula is offline
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I think the first death I saw was my grandfather's when I was about 11 years old. I was totally shocked because more than the feeling of sadness for my grandfather not being there anymore..I was experiencing the whole happening of death for the first time. I saw my grandfathers cold body and as he was highly diabatic and his limbs had hardened the figure was not very pleasing to look at.

I loved him very very much and still do...but as an experience in itself, that was one memory I will never forget..seeing my first death.
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  #19  
Old November 11th, 2007, 22:06
MaxRyb MaxRyb is offline
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The first death that i experienced was that of my great grandmother when i was 14. we weren't all that close but it was at that moment that i realized how mortal we all are, and how important life is.
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  #20  
Old November 17th, 2008, 14:23
Allie84 Allie84 is offline
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I turned 22 on March 8, 2006 and Heather died March 31, 2006. Her 21st birthday would have been April 6, but instead it was the day we laid her to rest.
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