Relief

[Calypso]

I know this has been mentioned in a couple of other threads, too, but I wanted to bring it up here. When someone has died a long, lingering death, it's perfectly natural for the family to feel relief. Relief that their loved one isn't suffering anymore. Relief that THEY'RE not suffering anymore. Relief that the whole ordeal is over and a sense of normalcy can slowly creep back into their lives.

If you have watched a loved one die a protracted death, remember that relief is as normal a feeling as grief and try to be gentle with yourself as you deal with all your mixed emotions.

[cassiem0221]

Yes, I too agree. I have a friend who's mother died of a long lived disease. It was very difficult for everyone to watch. There was nothing to be done and the only thing that helped was medicating her so she wasn't really hurting just "out of it" most of the time. When things were over, my friend was relieved and she felt guilty for feeling that way. There was no sense in her feeling guilty. It is only natural and it was what was best for EVERYONE.

[ssleutz]

Yes you are right about that. And it is a relief knowing that your loved ones are not suffering and are no longer in pain.

[riskey58]

It is so hard to watch someone you love suffering for a long period of time. After watching them suffer like this it is normal that their death is a relief for you and for them.

[Taggart]

I've felt relief when someone passed away, knowing that there was no chance of recovery.

In some cases it has helped to know the person well enough to know that they wouldn't want to spend any more time suffering.

[victell]

I agree with your sentiments and think it is human to feel relief (mixed of course with guilt at feeling that way) in addition to grief and sadness. If someone you love has been suffering for a long time, their eventual death can be a "relief" both to them and the ones the leave behind.

[Priscilla]

Of course, some cultures and traditions have us so conditioned to feel guilt that we have a hard time accepting relief.

[Sunnycharacter]

I understand relief. It is difficult to not feel guilty for wishing relief for a loved one. But it also makes us feel selfish for wishing them to remain, no matter the pain they go through. The Lord does not wish us suffering, so I don't cling to the temporary shell we live in.

[jnjsarauer]

When my mother-in-law died of kidney failure after years of dealing with diabetic complications, we did feel relief in one sense. She did not want to live in her current condition, so we were happy for her in that sense. That did ease our grief somewhat.